My perfect bird!

 Yesterday when I was at a gathering, someone said - “ If you know how to write, you know how to draw”. Listening to it, I smiled, yes, technically correct, personally a little hard for me to unpack.

I went to one of the best schools in the state where I grew up in. I love my school and the teachers, but the culture was to put all your emphasis on learning math, science and languages. Art was something to be done in your free time and no one really taught us how to draw anything. There were multiple classes for math at different levels of the students, before school class for the smarty pants (or the ones who got a lot of help from home), the after school class for the ones who needed a little help. But art was in a separate category - either you are a genius child with tremendous potential or you are just a kid who likes to doodle. 

I belonged to the second category - I drew with abandon when I was a child.  But in my pre teens I just stopped drawing for fun, learning or growing that skill. As I grew older, I became more conscious of my unrealistic drawing and did even less. Then as an adult I became one of those people who say - “ I can’t draw”. So basically, I draw like an 7-10 year old

Couple of years ago, my daughter started showing interest in painting and drawing just like any other 5 year old would. So we got some supplies and started drawing and painting, mostly making a mess. Goofing around with her, I was having fun. 

Slowly I started watching youtube videos, got more supplies and I remember my first acrylic painting. I got some canvas on sale and some acrylic paint. I was armed with the knowledge of youtube videos and woke up early on a Saturday just to try my hand at painting. At 5:00 in the morning I realized we do not have any decent brushes (5 year olds have a way of somehow destroying brushes in record time), so I remembered this video of using a credit card to do the painting and honestly I am so glad that it came out well, otherwise I would have abandoned this whole painting thing :)

Fast forward two years and a lot of happy accidents later, my daughter announced that she wants to take art class. As I was doing my research for a class - it hit me that this is what I need - go to a real class and take lessons. So here I am in a class with other 7-10 year olds and it is fun but more importantly humbling and an experience that keeps reminding me to put things in perspective.

Few days ago, the teacher announced - “ We are going to draw a bird”. The whole class went "Yay! I love birds", except the 40 year old woman. I said “ A bird sounds daunting.” I remember what I said exactly because immediately my daughter asked me - “ What is daunting, that does not sound like a good word at all !” The teacher explained in steps - broke it down into shapes (BTW the teacher is super amazing and patient with all age groups) we all drew pretty decent birds. Then she said, ok now draw another bird facing this one.

 All the children went right to it while I gazed at my bird and started analyzing. Why is the teacher asking me to draw a mirror image, is it to exercise the other side of my brain. If so, how should I tackle this problem - should I break my bird to a grid or should I just stick to the basic shapes, where should I start. Should the beak be a triangle or more like a triangular prism? As I am dreading this exercise, I hear laughter from my side. In the few seconds when my brain completely froze, my 7 year old not only drew the second bird, she added a nest, some chicks and created a whole family. It was an adorable drawing.

We joined in the laughter and I heard another child say - ' My bird is perfect’, Another child shouted - “ I love mine, he is perfect, look at him”. Soon the whole class was Oohing and Aahing about their birds. The teacher came over and gently asked me - “ So what do you think about your bird? '' When I first looked at it, I could only see the imperfections, but then I channeled the children around me. I am learning like any other 8 year old. This is the best bird I have ever drawn. I loved my bird, look at her - she is perfect!!! I was not pretending. I actually like my bird!

You know the person was right yesterday, if you can write, you can draw. But the question is are you ok with that drawing? And I learnt recently that I am totally ok with mine. My acceptance and rate of judginess is that of a 7 year old. I am not judging my 20 minute drawing to a master painter who spent hours in training and in drawing or someone with real talent. I am basically learning to write a new language. Previously when I looked at one of my paintings I only found the problems. Now I only focus on the fun. I am not a professional artist, I am just a middle aged woman having fun learning a new skill.

BTW, I got the best compliments ever from my two beloved people in the world - my 4 year old said - Your bird looks so soft and my mother said It's a really healthy looking happy bird.

Yup, I agree! She is mine and she is soft, healthy and perfect!