I have been running wrong

Few weeks ago, I was texting some friends encouraging them to join the local couch to 5K. My 8 year old saw it and asked, “Can I do the program, can we run together?'' I was very happy to hear this, a bit skeptical about her commitment but still pleased that she was interested in it. We have been running for the last few weeks and she opened me into a whole different world of running!

Here is an example of our run together -  We are ready to go and she always carries a cute little bag in front of her. She has packed cheese, candy, nuts and a surprise for me! I try my best to persuade her to leave the bag as it will not be comfortable, but she insists. 

Next, she looks at me head to toe disapprovingly of my old T shirt and shorts. She is dressed in a beautiful dress, pretty socks, her hair done in a fancy style and of course the little snack purse. She runs to her room and comes back with some threads tied to a hair pin and tells me that I need to look good when I run. Obviously, I don't have nice clothes like she has, so wants me to wear this hair thread thing to make me look fabulous. I thought this was a good idea, I need all the help I can get in this department. 

So now we have snacks and we look amazing, so we are ready to run! In my runs, whenever I stop, I feel it as a sign of weakness. With her, we stop because we just have to! We have to stop because our shadows look too crazy long. “Amma, look at our fingers, we look like aliens!! Let's dance, let's take some Alien selfies”. We stop because she has to do a cartwheel on the road. I try to get her to focus on the run, but she points out that this is a beautiful spot for a cartwheel, “ I have never done a cartwheel on a bridge, so we have to stop! “ We stop because there are rainbows on the road! (water droplets on gas left by a car). She says- “ Take a picture, take a picture, it is so beautiful!! I can’t believe we are so lucky and we found these rainbows!” . 

We also stop whenever we are tired. When the trail is devoid of people, she screams “ P- A- I - N, Oh no!! P-A-I -N in my R-I-B-S” I ask her why are you spelling it out and screaming. She explains that spelling it out helps your mind to focus on the spelling and screaming is good for you. I ask her if it works, she says - “ No, I just like the look on your face when I scream P-A-I -N ” and we both start giggling! 

Then there is the food, whenever we turn to go back home, she gives me the surprise she packed for me (it is almost always peanut butter cups) and then enjoys her little snack. Ours runs are usually 20-30 minutes and she talks non stop the whole time.  One run was pretty much all about snakes, another about Bellatrix Lestrange, multiplication ,sometimes about how unfair Baba is ALL the time, about nail stickers, seeds and germination and the list is endless. I am either smiling or laughing or rolling my eyes pretty much the whole time. We sometimes hold hands and run, sometimes we race, sometimes we tell each other that we are the most amazing mother daughter running team ever! 

I am not an avid runner, the only time I truly enjoy  running is in the woods. But other than that, I don't like it much. When I run in general at the rail trail near my house or on the streets, I have a plan. Time, pace, distance is usually pre determined. The first 5 minutes are the worst...I feel like an idiot because I am so bad at it. Then slowly I get into a rhythm and mostly think about work. Then at some point there are few minutes of blankness in my brain which I enjoy, then I get all self critical. My pace is never good enough, my breathing is never deep enough as I climb my driveway and as I remove my shoes, the rush of adrenaline makes me smile (the only time I really smile in the whole run) and I am glad the run is over...

Well, you know what...in the last few weeks I learned from my little one that I have been doing it all wrong. Running is not about the pace or the distance. It is about looking good, eating things you like and most importantly stopping when you want to stop, stopping to look at the rainbows on the road, dancing with your shadows, stopping to catch your breath. 

Maybe that is what life is about too, sometimes we are all running - hardly happy with our pace, trying to be as fast as we can, not breathing deep, just doing it for the sake of doing it. We do not give ourselves permission to stop, permission to scream, permission to remind ourselves how amazing we are.

Thank you for this wise lesson little one - I am learning to love stopping, learning to not track my stats, but just do it because it makes me feel good!